How to Make Any Change

The irony of making any change in the human psyche is to actually stop resisting whatever it is. What we resist, persists. And the more we react to things about ourselves that we want to change the longer it stays. That is because our reaction to it is giving it power, keeping it alive and thriving. When we react to something negatively as in, "I'm so wrong for thinking or feeling this way" we keep feeding the issue because we have attached our sense of self to it. We think that it is defining us, therefore we have told our psyche: "This is true about me and I need to get rid of it."

When we react in a self-righteous way we tell our psyche: "I need to change this, because I can do better." This is traditionally how we go about change, but ironically this also gives it power because it tells our psyche that this issue is a part of our sense of self as well. If it isn't true then there is nothing to change, do you see? The fact that we believe we "need" to change it, shows that we are attaching ourselves to it as well. This just keeps it there longer because our psyche thinks its self-defining.

Both approaches give the particular issue power. It makes it real and just perpetuates the issue. It will never go away so long as we keep reacting to it, whether positively or negatively. The only way to move forward is to be non-reactive just like we would be if something was completely irrelevant to us. If something is clearly not true of us we just move on, right?

So if we are seeking to change something in our life, jump to the feeling that it is irrelevant because it has nothing to do with you. So if it is impatience you are working on, jump to the point where being impatient is not even a relevant option because OF COURSE you're patient. As in, impatience isn't even a relevant option for you.

"Pushing" or "working" for change gives it too much power. Let go, move on, be relaxed, stop giving it so much power. Ironically, don't care so much and you will be free. It is a paradox but I promise you it is the truth. Practice it for yourself and let me know what you come up with.

Hope this helps!

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