Obsessing Over an Ex-Partner - Trauma Mind

New Update: Announcing the Four Attachment Distress Responses Quiz and Course

https://www.alanrobarge.com/adrquiz

Many of us want to know how to heal, how to change, how to be more secure, etc. This is why I created the course: The Four Attachment Distress Responses. You're invited to take the quiz and learn about your Response.

Many of our behaviors in relationships are habitual - meaning we act out of autopilot. Our autopilot Response comes from past conditioning of negative experiences. When attachment injuries go unaddressed, we become insecure in our relationships.

The Four Attachment Distress Responses Course describes each specific type of guardedness, which means how we try to protect ourselves from getting hurt again while attempting to get our attachment needs met.

While we cannot change the past, we can change how we respond in the moment and in the future. This course offers you insights and tools as new ways to respond in your relationships. The Four Responses are Poking, Running, Hiding, and Submitting.

Check out the quiz to learn more: See link above.

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On my videos, I like to talk about and explore Healing Attachment Trauma, Relationship Repair, Inner Child Self-Re-Parenting, Codependency, Love Addiction, Grieving Break Ups, Family Programming, Love Yourself, Fantasy Relationships, Trauma Bonding, and CPTSD Breakthroughs.

Heal Your Relationships = #attachmenttrauma
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In this video, I explore ONE REASON WHY our mind loops in obsessive thinking over an ex-partner. He goes beyond the trauma-symptom explanation of hyper-arousal and intrusive-thinking, and instead introduces the idea of an underlying profound grief that is going unacknowledged.

The ex-partner shows up as a placeholder or object that we project onto. We project onto the ex-partner our history of unmet needs and unrequited love. We project onto the ex-partner our unresolved childhood grief of being ignored, neglected, abandoned, betrayed, or abused.

The image of the ex-partner is the minds way of calling attention to the fact that these painful feelings need attention. However as anyone who gets lost in this obsessive thinking knows, it is easy to get confused in this place and believe that the constant barrage of thoughts and feelings about the ex-partner are just about the ex-partner. Usually more is going on here than longing for the ex-partner.

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Thanks for watching this video.

If the topic of this video has sparked self-reflection and you are now asking yourself “How do I overcome this?”, “How can I heal?”, the Improve your Relationships community is the right place for you. To learn more about the membership community visit http://www.alanrobarge.com/community The community provides a structured and reoccurring 8-week program of helpful conversations, learning, and support; it offers resources, worksheets, and videos. It promotes a model of self-directed healing and invites self-accountability. You are invited to join us.

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I offer Attachment-Focused, Trauma Informed Relationship Coaching and Psychotherapy for Individuals and Couples. I work with adult clients dealing with relationship challenges or failures, lack of purpose, emotional-developmental trauma, and loneliness. I help clients solve problems, feel feelings, and get unstuck. I work with clients via telephone and video-conferencing.

Remember... emotional connections matter!

Alan Robarge, LPC
Attachment Focused, Trauma Informed
Psychotherapist and Relationship Coach

Obsessing Over an Ex-Partner - Trauma Mind
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Видео Obsessing Over an Ex-Partner - Trauma Mind канала Alan Robarge / Attachment Trauma Therapist