Retroactive Jealousy: 3 Ways to start OBSERVING your Thoughts

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Retroactive Jealousy: 3 Ways to start OBSERVING your Thoughts

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In this video I will share with you 3 ways in which you can start observing you thoughts as opposed to getting all wrapped up in them and actually identifying with them.

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Welcome back to another video my name is Matt and I help people overcome retroactive jealousy in this video we're going to talk about observing our thoughts now this is something you might hear a lot if you're practicing meditation practicing mindfulness or um you know maybe even reading books on retrofit chelsea a lot of them talk about this don't um get intertwined with your thoughts don't take your thoughts seriously just observe them now what does that actually mean observe them and what are kind of my three tips if you've never observed your thoughts before how you can kind of get started and how uh observing your thoughts uh really will help you overcome retroactively remember it's these thoughts that we're putting our attention and our focus on uh causing these anxious responses and obviously we're getting wrapped up in them and if we're no longer wrapped up in them and we can just observe them for what they are which are just intangible thoughts um we get our power back and we overcome retroactive jealousy so we will talk about that in this video before we get started though if you could activate youtube's algorithm i'd really appreciate that and you can do that by smashing the like button on this video also make sure you're subscribed to the channel for more retroactive jealousy content so observing our thoughts this is very important because a thought is a thought right all thoughts are the same all thoughts are only thoughts it's our judgments and labels that we place on these thoughts that cause us to feel anxiety cause us to feel a certain way and there's a quote um and josh john i didn't write it down so i won't I don't remember the exact quote or who it's from but basically it says the sound um every thought um is the same as like the sound of a bird outside for instance so every anxious thought is the same as hearing a bird chirp outside right hearing a bird chirp outside is just thought the thought is I heard a bird okay your partner having sex with somebody from the past is just a thought also but one we put a lot of attention a lot of label a lot of judgment on and the other one would just go oh that's a bird right but there's no difference between them really both of them are just thoughts one we're choosing to place a label on and one we're just almost observing you know we don't think anything of it there's a bird okay that's it so the bird we're observing this thought you know about your partner's past we're not observing we're getting we're we think it's real we're getting tangled up in it um we're feeling a lot of anxious response from it we feel like we have to do something in order to feel better all sorts of that stuff so but what if we start observing these thoughts right what if we start observing these retroactive jealous tests these thoughts of the past and treat them like the bird right treat them like the bird like yeah it's just the bird it's no big deal treat it like that okay yeah it's just a thought it's no big deal just a thought it's no big deal understand that you know we are not our thoughts I think that's a big one we're not our thoughts we tend to get very much tangled in our thoughts um they feel so real at times that we think they are us but you know we are the observers of our thoughts okay like the the you think of like the sky like we are the sky and the clouds are our thoughts so no matter how many clouds are in the sky the sky is always there the sky is always bright okay no the the the sky doesn't take attention to certain clouds or anything every single cloud comes and goes comes and goes and that's it that's it it always comes and always goes and our thoughts always come and they always go the only reason we feel like a certain thought lingers is because we have a judgment on it we have placed a label on it and we are playing with that thought a little bit it's fun to play with certain thoughts when they um benefit us but when they don't benefit us it's not fun at all so a couple ways that you can um observe your thoughts number one is to meditate in front of a candle flame it doesn't have to be a candle flame it can be really anything but to keep your eyes........

Видео Retroactive Jealousy: 3 Ways to start OBSERVING your Thoughts канала Retroactive Jealousy Relief