ep.47 "Why do I sometimes fantasize about horrible things happening to me?" | AKA

Audience Questions for Ask Kati Anything episode 47

1) Hey Kati, How long does it take you to "read" your clients mood if they don´t say anything? Can you see if they are struggling a lot or is it harder to see? I always wonder what techniques a therapist uses to adjust to each client's situation. (As a follow up: has this changed with video visits and not being able to see as much body language?)

2) Hi Kati, how do YOU keep yourself from judgment towards your patients (and us)? You always say that nothing is weird and we can say everything to our therapist, but don’t you ever find things weird, or stupid? Is our shame never in place? Isn’t it human to have such judgments towards others and do you train yourself not to look at them/us that way or do you simply not have them that way? I’m very curious what you have to say. Love from Holland!

3) Hi Kati, Why do I sometimes fantasize about horrible things happening to me? Sometimes I fantasize or almost wish something awful would happen to me, for example, a car accident or an assault. I have no idea why I do this and logically I know I would not want any of those things to happen, but a part of me almost finds comfort in...

4) Hi Kati! I was wondering if you've got any tips on staying motivated. Recently, I've been having trouble getting things done such as schoolwork and other necessary tasks throughout the day. I've always been a straight-A student in the past, but recently I've found myself so unmotivated that I can't seem to get anything done...

5) Hey Kati, do you have any tips with figuring out sexuality? I thought I was fairly certain that I'm straight, however, I constantly want to be around my female best friend and prefer spending time with her than with my boyfriend. I also admire girls but...

6) Hi Kati, I have a curious question. Why do you always use "we" when explaining something? For example you say things like "when we are traumatised" or "when we suffer from BPD" or "when we feel abandoned" etc instead of "people who are traumatised" or...

7) Hi Kati! I have a bad habit of apologizing for everything, for example, I've said sorry when my coworker bumped into a bookcase and I witnessed it, and I have tried replacing it with thank you but it didn't stick at all. I also say sorry when people say they are having a bad day or event. I use it as a default for almost everything like to start a sentence or if I feel I'm not explaining something right so I find this word a struggle to get rid of saying as much as I do. Any advice on how to stop using it so much?

8) Hi Kati! I noticed I've become SO awkward in casual small talks (I stumble with words much worse than I did before) and I don't even want to get in conversations with anybody else than my boyfriend and family these days. Feels like I can't be bothered. Could this be a consequence of 10 month covid lockdown? Thank you for all you do!

9) Hi Kati, How can I keep trying when every time I try things get immediately harder? I´ve been battling anxiety, depression and my social anxiety for so long, I don't remember a time without it. I take my medication, I go to therapy but it takes so much effort to even try, just to get pushed back down even further. How am I supposed to believe that it will get better, cause every time I start to believe it even a little, things really just do get worse.

10) What would you say if a client asked you what you think of them? Would answer or ask why they want to know. I always worry about what people think of me. I always assume that people think badly of me, even when there is no evidence.

JOURNALING CLUB
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Are u ok?
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