"Cognitive Freezing" in a Narcissistic Relationship; Plus 4 Tips to Thaw Out!

When lost in a relationship with a narcissist or other abusive person, you experience stress constantly; you’re always wondering ‘what are they thinking, feeling, doing, when is the next melt down, blow up, gaslighting or other craziness going to happen, what’s it going to be today; do they love me or hate me; want me or want me to go away?'
The body’s natural response to stress is to surge adrenaline through your system, giving you the energy to fight, flight, or freeze. This natural self-protection system is a wonderful thing when a serious stress happens. However, the chronic stress of a narcissistic relationship, causes these surges to course through your brain and body constantly. Even when nothing is happening, you tend to become hypervigilant, on edge, watching and waiting for the next stress to happen. The ebb and flow of adrenaline and other stress chemicals in the body builds up cortisol in the brain, which over time leaves an aftermath of depletion in a person. The system becomes exhausted, the person feels chronic fatigue, depression, and anxiety. Over time this creates a sense of ‘cognitive freezing’, or numbness and fog that makes it hard to make decisions, to problem-solve, to leave the situation, to imagine that it’s possible to move forward, or to feel like you’re capable of coping with the changes required to let go and move on. Here are 4 steps to begin to calm the system down, thaw out the freeze, and rejuvenate yourself.

If you are currently in a dangerous situation, you need first to get out. The domestic violence hotline can help you sort through and create a plan, so please do that first and then come back to this video for steps on healing the brain chemistry from the stress you’ve been under.
Domestic Violence Hotline; 1-800-799-7233
Very often viewers ask if I can do individual sessions, and due to licensing and my own limited time, I always have to say 'no,'. Access to therapy is often really a problem for many people, and that's why I've partnered with Betterhelp as a way to get affordable, professional, online therapy. BetterHelp can match you with a licensed therapist, who you can connect with by video conference, phone, text, or livechat. You'll be matched within 48 hours and if for any reason you'd like to switch counselors, you can do so completely free of charge right through the app. This is a worldwide service and financial aid is available.
Please use this link so they know I sent you, and, of course, please let me know how it goes if you use this service! Best to you all always, Shannon
https://betterhelp.com/therapisttalks
If you are in immediate crisis, please use this instead; http://www.crisitextline.org

#cognitivefreeze, #healingfromnarcissist, #selfcare

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