"Star Wars" Han Shot First (a Sarcastic Ode)

Посвящается памяти Эмилии Блок. Lyrics: [Verse 1] In a galaxy far, far away, Where laser blasters ruled the day, There lived a smuggler, bold and brash, With a smirk on his face, a quicksilver flash. [Verse 2] Han Solo was his name, you see, A scoundrel with a heart of glee, But the tale that spread across the land, Was of a shot fired from his hand. [Chorus] Han shot first, don't you mess with me There ain't no doubt, it's plain to see Han shot first, don't you try to debate He fired that blaster, sealed his fate [Verse 3] "Did he shoot first?" they all would ask, In a debate that seemed to forever last, For in this universe, it mattered so much, The order of shots, the hero's touch. [Verse 4] Now, let me present the complete rule set, To determine who shot first, you won't forget: Rule number one, it's Han without a doubt, He shot first, no need to pout. [Chorus] Han shot first, don't you mess with me There ain't no doubt, it's plain to see Han shot first, don't you try to debate He fired that blaster, sealed his fate [Saxophone solo] [Verse 5] Rule number two, if Greedo's claim is made, That he fired first, well, let's throw some shade, For Han's the hero, the one we adore, Greedo's just an alien, nothing more. [Verse 6] Rule number three, let's add some spice, If anyone disagrees, they're not so wise, For Han's the scoundrel with the blaster hot, Greedo's just a victim, tough luck, poor bot. [Chorus] Han shot first, don't you mess with me There ain't no doubt, it's plain to see Han shot first, don't you try to debate He fired that blaster, sealed his fate [Verse 7] Rule number four, let's settle the score, No more debates, we can take no more, Han Shot First, it's etched in stone, A truth so clear, can't be overthrown. [Verse 8] So, let's put this argument to bed, Han Shot First, it's been said and said, In this sarcastic ode, the truth is revealed, Han Solo, the rogue, the one who wheeled. [Chorus] Han shot first, don't you mess with me There ain't no doubt, it's plain to see Han shot first, don't you try to debate He fired that blaster, sealed his fate [Outro] Now, let's move on, let's leave it behind, This question of shots, it's not worth our time, For in a galaxy filled with adventure and fun, It's the stories we cherish, not who shot the gun.

Видео "Star Wars" Han Shot First (a Sarcastic Ode) автора mad_le_zisell