10 Foundations For Building A Healthier Relationship

Mark E. Smith, MSW is the Founder and Director of Family Tree Life Coaching. He previously worked as a highly respected therapist and author in the Indianapolis area for 32+ years. He now practices as a Life and Relationship Coach. He offers coaching for individuals, couples, families, family businesses, executive leaders, pastors, and therapists. He has world class coaching expertise in Affair Recovery, Relationship Issues, Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome, Sexual Addiction, Abuse, Trauma, Complex PTSD, Anxiety, Mid-Life Issues, Shame and Abandonment Issues. If you need a safe, courageous, cutting, marriage-jolting healer, he is your guy. You can contact Mark Smith at jones.basketball@gmail.com and 317-507-8866.

Mark Smith shares 12 foundational requirements for building a healthy relationship...

1. Strong Original Chemistry,

2. Brokenness - walls down'

3. Motivation - Disturbed by your Dysfunction'

4. Teachability'

5. Pain - it shows strength to cry'

6. Trust - some people cannot do this,

7. Trustworthiness - (books, homework, Commitment to the marriage),

8. A Great Therapist - the 12 C's,

9. Time - a life time of Recovery really and

10. Realistic Expectations

#1 A great therapist is extremely Confident. They know who they are. They know the extent of their healing powers (given the right client). When the future Queen showed up at Lionel’s office to scout out his talents he humbly informed her that he could without a doubt heal her husband’s speech defects. This rang true to her. Lionel believed in his gift.

#2 A great therapist is Clear. They have solid boundaries. They have their ways of healing and those ways are non-negotiable. He would pass on the opportunity if the King would not come to his place for the work. He would not come to the King. There would be no smoking.

#3, #4 & #5 A great therapist is Creative, Clever and Cute in his or her work. Lionel kept Berty off balance from the very beginning of their relationship. He used rye humor, unorthodox techniques and a refreshing, playful demeanor to engage a very resistant client in the work. At times it takes the spirit of a child to reach the child deeply buried in the core of some wounded people. Lionel joyfully played cat and mouse with his hurting but nearly unworkable new project. Trust is earned. It isn’t handed out to just anyone. To engage resistant, untrusting souls in the vulnerable and painful dance of effective therapy a skilled therapist needs to bait the line with interesting, shiny objects that catch the client’s attention. Lionel knew his stuff and he knew how to play the game in a way that would enliven Berty.

#6 A great therapist Cares a great deal for his or her clients Lionel seemed like a kind a father to Berty.

#7 A great therapist is Childhood focused. From the first few minutes of therapy Lionel was trying to get deeper than techniques and tools. He asked Berty what his earliest childhood memory was. He knew that the stuttering problem had its roots in Berty’s childhood wounds. Since Berty was a high and mighty buttoned up Englishman he certainly had no intention of sharing such private information with this odd stranger who probably couldn’t heal him anyway. It is all about your childhood folks.

#8 A great therapist is Confidential. They do not need to impress others with the prestigious names of their clients. Lionel had never told his wife that his challenging client was none other than the King of England himself.

#9 A great therapist is occasionally quite Confounded. Therapy can hurt for both the therapist and the client. When clients get defensive, angry or reactive a therapist can certainly feel some pain as a result.

#10 A great therapist is quite Contrite when they make mistakes and they do make mistakes. They are capable of recognizing when they are wrong and they are able to humbly apologize. Therapy is often enriched by the foibles and the weaknesses of the therapist. Therapists are mere humans. We are all quite flawed. Since most often their parents could never humbly admit fault and apologize, clients are touched and astonished when their therapist unashamedly apologizes. Lionel had a humble heart and his reaching out to Berty no doubt started the thawing out of their broken off relationship.

#11 A great therapist is almost Clairvoyant. They can at times predict your future unerringly. Lionel knew that Berty had greatness in him. He knew that he was going to become a great and courageous King. He believed in Berty long before Berty believed in himself. Sometimes it takes someone else envisioning our bright future before we can grow into that notion ourselves.

#12 A great therapist is most certainly consistently Courageous. I believe this one characteristic is the one that holds most therapists back from being more life changing. In movies and on television therapists are usually depicted as beard stroking pacifist sissies who sit back and let you figure your stuff out by yourself.

Видео 10 Foundations For Building A Healthier Relationship канала Mark Smith Family Tree Life Coaching