EP 5: How To Say No Quickly and Gracefully

How to say no without feeling guilty? How to stand up for yourself when you really want to say no?

I’m a recovering people pleaser. I just didn’t know how to say no to people. And in the rare times I did say no, I used to literally feel hurt or guilty, especially if I actually had time to do whatever it is they were asking of me. Declining someone's invitation made me feel like I was being mean.

I eventually learned that putting my priorities first and doing what I wanted to do with my free time is another form of self-care. So now I say ‘no’ unapologetically.

I’m helping you do the same in today’s video with my strategies:

1. Unattach yourself from the outcome – if you really want to say no, refrain from thinking far ahead on how it could change things for you. Focusing too much on the possibility of conflict or misunderstanding will only make it harder.
2. Acknowledge the request – say no to people while leaving their dignity intact. Thank them for their time, kindness or consideration.
3. Offer a clear decline – give them a reply that makes little to no room for hope or expectations. If you're firm, it will also allow them to move forward and reach others who will be right for them.
4. Avoid lengthy explanation – refrain from making up lengthy excuses or lying. Most people will respect a valid and honest explanation.
5. Accept whatever their response is – if you’ve been clear and respectful, you have the right not to feel bad after. Value your own judgment and unattach yourself from their response.

Don’t worry if you find yourself struggling even will all these. It wasn’t a quick process for me and it does take practice.

Are you guilty of not saying NO as often as you should or you want to? Which of the five steps has been a special struggle for you? And what are you committed to adding to your process now that you’ve heard mine?

Share your answers in the comments below or in my website patricewashington.com

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Видео EP 5: How To Say No Quickly and Gracefully канала Patrice Washington