My Mother's Shadow Part 1: #NotInvitedToMyWedding

Cutting off a narcissistic or abusive parent is an act of self-preservation, not spite. Your experiences are valid, and you’re not obligated to give someone access to your life simply because of shared DNA.

I was 24 when I finally cut my mother out of my life. To some, that might sound drastic—unthinkable, even. But if you grew up in my skin, hearing the words I heard day after day, you’d understand.

For as long as I can remember, my mother told me I wasn’t good enough. Ugly. Stupid. Worthless. It was like a broken record that played on repeat, one I never asked to hear but could never switch off. I don’t remember her ever complimenting me. Not once.

As a child, I found myself studying other mothers like a foreign language. I’d watch how my friends’ mums hugged them, spoke proudly of them, fussed over them. I knew, even then, that I didn’t have that. But I still clung to the hope that maybe one day my mother would soften, or see me, or love me the way I needed. That day never came
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