How to Free Yourself from the Destructive Cycle of Romantic Obsession

Whenever I'd catch myself caught up in those narratives, I'd say, okay, what are the deepest feelings behind all that? And from there, I would bring my full awareness to whatever I was feeling, whether it was sadness or fear or grief or feeling anxious or fearful of loss or strung out. just bring my full awareness to what I was feeling and I would breathe softly and deeply from the depths of those feelings and sensations. And that was the beginning of my breaking that pattern of romantic obsession. So many of us suffered abuses as children, repeated heartbreaks and other traumas and the emotional wounding that we carry runs extraordinarily deep. And while some of us may rapidly get over a breakup and let go of unhealthy attachments, for others, it's like a drug addiction. except in this case, it's an addiction to a person and the relationship you have with them or that you wanna have with them. What so many people fail to understand is that if you're not able to access those underlying feelings that are driving that obsession and do the deep level processing of what you're feeling emotionally, keeps you stuck or fixated on that person, fueling the obsession that prevents you from healing and letting go and moving on for those of us who have spent our lives numbing ourselves to our emotions it could be extraordinarily difficult to actually get in touch with what we're feeling we may experience it at a superficial level and it drives the crazy the acting out that we're doing the obsession but again it's a more superficial level of feeling and i had to make an extraordinary effort to stay present with what I could feel and keep breathing with it. as I did so, like I remember one night after someone had ghosted me in my late twenties, And as I stayed with that, at some point, it felt like the bottom dropped out from under me and I dropped into this horrid pit of excruciatingly uncomfortable feelings. And yet there are many other people who are overwhelmed by their emotions. It feels horrendous. But to the best of our ability, we need to be able to access these feelings because if you can't feel it. You can't heal it. We need to bring our full awareness to be fully present with what we're feeling so that these deep emotional wounds can heal.

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