Teh & Oh-Aew | Broken [+1x04]

This was really hard to edit for me. I usually make edits to make people and myself happy while watching the edit afterwards and here it's just not the case. Also some stuff just hits really close to home so I just wanted to get this edit done as soon as possible lol.
But can we talk about Billkin's and PP's acting? OH MY GOD. I was and am still so impressed. They are incredibly talented.
Episode 4 left me speechless; it was just so real and portrayed the struggles of lgbtqa+ people realistically which is why it hurt so much. I saw lots of hate for Teh on Twitter?
I loved him even more after this episode. He's such a complex and realistic character.
He's still a kid and in this episode he found out that his childhood hero was actually his first crush which must be so traumatising.
His whole life he built around becoming him and being able to act that role one day but deep down he actually was attracted to him. I never thought I would cry during a jerking off scene but here I am haha.
Also people have to understand that it isn't new to Oh-Aew that he's attracted to dudes, he had a crush on Bass before and his family and maybe his friends already know and he already accepted himself.
For Teh this is all new, so it's understandable that he is scared and struggling and that he doesn't want to dissapoint his mum, who so desperately wants grandchildren.

In episode 1 there was a scene where both were kids and Oh-Aew asked Teh if he would've given him his spot... and now he did. :( He gave up all that he's worked for (and we all thought he had it easy but during that conversation with his mum it got revealed that he also struggled a lot getting good grades etc.) because he felt so guilty and because he loves Oh-Aew.

And even though it's cruel and painful- I loved how the show didnt romanticise his sacrifice.
You don't give up everything you worked for and throw away your future in an impulsive reaction because you love someone. And now he has to suffer from the consequences.
Oh-Aew told him that he doesn't understand him. And maybe he's right. Teh should've known that Oh-Aew is competitive and would want to prove himself that he can get in and work for it himself.

The Bra-Scene was just so beautifully shot. Oh-Aew thinking he had to change himself for Teh because feeling his flat chest got Teh to realise he was touching a man during episode 3 in the back scratching scene... Baby, No. I loved how the show wanted to portray how you don't have to change yourself for anyone, if they don't love you for who you are, then maybe they are not right for you.

I don't think anyone of them will die anymore but I think they'll not end up together and that we'll get an open ending. Someone said that Billkin and PP talked about how they might be special episodes or something similar coming out in the future, so there is hope!
I obviously want them to be endgame but Teh has to start loving and accepting himself first to be ready to be in a relationship with Oh-Aew and to treat him like he deserves.

My heart hurts so much for both of them and I miss seing their smiles. :,)
Who knows, I might make a happy edit soon before ep 5 drops because with this song I couldn't really add happy scenes lol.
And seeing them happy, makes me happy.

I am ranting again and don't really know what I am saying.

This show is incredible and a masterpiece and I hope that they'll get all the awards for it especially since in the behind the scenes videos you can see how much effort the crew AND the actors put into it.
Colouring: SunnyVids
Show: I told sunset about you
Song: title

Видео Teh & Oh-Aew | Broken [+1x04] канала Lacrima