My Opponent is a Liar and He Cannot Be Trusted - SOUTH PARK

At the first Presidential debate, Garrison speaks from the heart and tries to convince everyone to vote for his opponent.
"The Damned" S20

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INT. BACKSTAGE OF DEBATES - NIGHT
Hillary is sitting on a couch looking over transcripts as
two campaign managers - one male one female - try and prep
her for the debates.
FEMALE CAMPAIGN MANAGER
Here's everything to try and prepare
you for the debates, ma'am. Just
try and stay focused no matter what
your opponent says.
MALE CAMPAIGN MANAGER
Don't let him rattle you. He's
going to do whatever he can to try
and mess with your head. Don't buy
into it. Whatever he says, just
respond with 'My opponent is a liar
and he cannot be trusted'
HILLARY CLINTON
Got it.
INT. PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE THEATER - NIGHT
Now the two are onstage as a boom camera sweeps over them
and the crowd and the TITLES APPEAR-
DECISION 2016 - First Presidential Debate.
NARRATOR
Decision 2016. The first
Presidential debate. With moderator
Lester Holt.
LESTER HOLT
Okay let's get right into it. Our
first question is for you, sir. How
will you deal with ground troops in Syria.
MR. GARRISON
Everyone... I need to just speak
from the heart here. Uh, I don't
know what the fuck I'm doing. I've
got to come clean - I- I had no idea
I would get this far, but the fact
of the matter is I should NOT be
President. Ok? I will fuck this
country up beyond repair.
Cut to the audience looking confused.
CUT TO: BACKSTAGE WHERE THE CLINTON MANAGERS ARE WATCHING
ON SCREEN.
MR. GARRISON
I am a SICK, ANGRY little man.
PLEASE, if you care at all about the
future of our country - Vote for
her. Okay? She's the one who at
least has some experience. She-
She's not as bad you think. I
promise. And unlike me, SHE'S
actually capable of running this
country.
Clinton stands looking at him, then eases up to the podium
mic and says dryly.
HILLARY CLINTON
My opponent is a liar and he cannot
be trusted.
IN THE VIEWING BOOTH -
The two Clinton campaign managers can't believe it.
FEMALE CAMPAIGN MANAGER
NOO!
MALE CAMPAIGN MANAGER
Oh my God, she is such a turd
sandwich.
Back to the stage; Hillary continues, Garrison stands in
disbelief.
HILLARY CLINTON
What he is saying is simply not
true. Do not believe it.
MR. GARRISON
I am giving you this, lady. I AM
GIVING you this. What the fuck are
you doing?
(back to audience)
Okay look, look just-- vote for her.
She knows politics, she really wants
to put this country first-
HILLARY CLINTON
My opponent is a liar -
MR. GARRISON
Would you just PLEASE shut up-
HILLARY CLINTON
And he CAN NOT be-
MR. GARRISON
Get out of your own way-
HILLARY CLINTON
Cannot be trusted.
Garrison buries his face in one hand and sighs.
MR. GARRISON
(sighs)
Okay, okay look- She doesn't mean
what she's saying. She just doesn't
know how to take this because it's
very weird and her advisors
probably-
HILLARY CLINTON
My opponent is a liar. And cannot
be trusted.
MR. GARRISON
Oh fuck. Why the fuck did it
have to be her? I'm so fucked.

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