How to BUILD Trust And EARN Respect | Jocko Willink

How to BUILD Trust And EARN Respect | Jocko Willink

Jocko Willink talks about how to build trust, and explains how respect and influence comes with it.

Credits:
Impact Theory
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnYMOamNKLGVlJgRUbamveA

Speaker: Jocko Willink

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Transcript:
My first platoon,
we were doing a training operation,
we get into this tactical situation,
everyone in my platoon is focused on one area,
everyone’s looking down their weapons
waiting for a threat to expose itself.
Which means you got 16 guys looking down their weapons
and I’m waiting for someone to make a call.
I was a new guy, I’m waiting for someone
above me in the chain of command to say,
“Hey, move here” or “Hey, move forward”
or make some kind of a decision.
And as I’m waiting no one’s doing it.
So, I’m a new guy, I’m scared to say anything
and I know I shouldn’t say anything,
so I’m just waiting and no one’s giving an order,
no one’s giving any direction.
So I wait longer.
And this goes on for probably 30 seconds or a minute,
which is a really long time when you’re trying to take down a target.
And finally I said to myself,
“Alright I’m gonna see what’s going on”.
So I actually point my weapon at the ceiling and I take a step back,
and I just look around.
And I see that every single person in my platoon,
including my platoon commander,
including the assistant platoon commander,
including the platoon leading petty officer,
everyone is just focused on their weapons
and no one’s making a decision.
And I can see this. And because I’m looking around
and I’m detached from this scenario,
just by 8in I stepped back,
stepped back and looked around,
I can see what decision needs to be made.
And so, I summoned up as much courage as I could as a new guy,
because new guys don’t make decisions,
and I said, “Hold left, clear right!”
which was a basic command that
we had rehearsed and we would practice.
And I expected someone to say, you know, “Shut up! Shut up Jocko!”,
but instead they repeated the command.
They all said “Hold left, clear right!”
which means we were gonna execute it.
And sure enough, the guys on the left held
and the guys on the right cleared,
we got done, and instead of someone saying
“Hey you need to keep your mouth shut!”
One of the more senior guys said,
“Hey good job up there. Way to make a call”.
So, I looked at him, I said, “Wait a second”,
How could I’ve, as a new guy, have made a decision in that situation,
that was better than what the more senior,
more experienced guys were making.
And I realised it was because I took a step back and detached from it.
So, at that moment I said to myself,
“Okay, from now on,
when I get into these tactical scenarios,
I’m gonna take a step back,
and I’m gonna try and look around
and I’m gonna try and detach myself
from the chaos and the mayhem”.
And I started doing it all the time,
in every tactical situation,
in the land warfare,
in the mountains, in the urban environments,
I was doing it all the time!
And I was able to like see what was happening.
It was like a superpower to be able to see what was happening
and make decisions.
And so, then I actually started doing it
when I was having conversations
and if you and I were in disagreement,
and if you started getting emotional,
instead of me getting emotional back at you,
I would just take a step back and be like,
“Oh okay, he’s really concerned about this,
why is he so concerned?
What does he see that I don’t see?”.
And I started actually,
just detaching all the time
and that became a very powerful tool that I use to this day.
There’s a word that people bring up a lot,
and I think they’re pretty interchangeable
and it’s relationships and trust.
Trust is built on relationships, relationships are built on trust.
If you don’t trust me, we don’t really have a relationship.
The more deeply you trust me,
the better relationship we have.
So how do I build trust with you?

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