How to Avoid Covert Manipulation + Control - Terri Cole

Covert manipulation can be part of a cycle of abuse inside a dysfunctional relationship. This behavior is not limited to romantic partnerships. It can happen in any relationship when one person seeks to get their needs met through coercive or deceptive methods of control.

Over time, covert manipulation can damage your self-esteem, self-trust, and self-worth. If you’re always walking around feeling guilty, like you’re not doing enough or second-guessing yourself, it might be time to take a closer look at your relationships.

If you have perfectionist, people-pleasing, codependent or empathic tendencies, you might be more vulnerable to believing someone else’s lies about you and/or your behavior. Covert manipulation tactics can be sneaky, but when you raise your awareness, it is so much easier not to get caught up in this painful cycle.

This week, I’m breaking down the most common manipulation tactics so you can spot them, understand what’s really going on, and make a conscious choice to no longer engage in this painful dance.

Inside this week’s downloadable guide, you’ll find the complete list of covert manipulative behaviors (shout out to Darlene Lancer’s work!). I’ve also included questions to help you get more clarity around your personal history to help you understand why you might be especially vulnerable to this kind of dysfunctional behavior pattern. Sometimes we can't name the behavior or the interaction, but we can almost always identify our feelings if given powerful and direct questions.

Be sure to download your guide right here: https://www.terricole.com/avoid-covert-manipulation-guide

Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist and global leading expert in female empowerment. For two decades, Terri has worked with some of the world’s most well-known personalities from international pop stars to Fortune 500 CEOs. Terri has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible, and then actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change i.e. true transformation. She empowers over 250,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, Real Love Revolution and Boundary Bootcamp + her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. She is also the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free (April 2021)

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